Aspiration, Ideals

A BLUE LIGHT SPECIAL

I feel like I went to church at The Blue Room and there were a thousand points of light to illuminate and connect what has been on my mind. We went to hear live R&B. The man on the stool next to me in the sort of makeshift balcony assumed we needed a guide to understand the music and culture of the evening. He couldn’t have known he was an offering.

I have been thinking a lot about calling and commissioning. My favorite words in the Bible are “Go to the house…on Straight Street.” A clear call. I’ve grown frustrated with how hard I edit ideas. It will take too much effort. It can’t be profitable. This from the girl with the heretofore go big or go home state of mind.

I sat in a booth with J. years ago and he asked me why every idea has to be a grand idea. On this day—before epiphanies in that jazz house—I had just edited a column for a client in which he said he used to dream big to try to make a big difference in the world. Now he asks whether he’s making a big difference in any one person’s life in pursuit of those big dreams.

The gentleman leaning in to us in the dark said after a career in risk management he’d been called to the field of elder abuse. He said there are stories too grim to tell. He also said he’d never imagined he would become a caregiver for his wife with cancer. And he said before we turned back to the music he has learned the life-giving power of three words, you are capable.

Later J. and I sat eating seafood gumbo at a bar at a restaurant on a street I love. Tall trees with blue lights and raised beds that set the seasonal standard for exquisite planning and planting create the boundary for this uber chic, upscale place. Looking out at those lights, it seemed simple. Maybe we’re all called to find or be content in our lane, our power and light, that thing we can do in service of others because we are capable.

About Laurie

Laurie Carney is a strategist, writer, editor and account executive in her professional life. She is at home with her husband Jeffrey, also a strategist and creative director/writer, and papillion Freddie. She has four beautiful children now that her son and daughter are happily married.
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